Look before you launch apples in the dark

Refreshed from an 11-day vacation, I hit the road at 5 a.m. yesterday to resume my extreme commute to New York. As if I wasn't rusty enough commuting-wise, there was black ice afoot, and I was driving the family car -- an all-wheel drive Toyota Highlander, which is not my usual commuting vessel -- because of the snow/sleet/rain mix expected on my drive home tomorrow.

But I was otherwise prepared. I had packed some food the night before, for starters, and remembered to set the coffee timer so it would be brewed by the time I finished getting ready in the morning. My clothes for the day were laid out and bags were packed, buying me an extra 15 minutes of sleep in addition to saving me from fumbling too much in the dark and running the risk of waking a child or two.

While I had not slept well Sunday night, I was still feeling pretty good and back in the swing of things as I headed west. The iPod was cranking, and I was ready for my coffee after munching a granola bar, some smoked almonds and an apple for breakfast.

So while keeping my eyes locked on the road, I hit the button to roll down the passenger-side window in preparation for returning the apple core to a natural habitat. While the 32-degree air was blowing back into the car at highway speeds, I held the window button an extra couple of seconds, to make sure it was open all the way.

Then the windup... and the pitch...

KA-SPLAT!

What the...?!

Once I recovered my breath and my heart returned to its rightful place in my chest, I looked over to see apple juice and smithereens splattered all over the passenger seat, while the apple core was resting on top of my backpack on the floor. There also was a big smear of apple juice and bits dead-center on the front passenger-side window.

I had hit the wrong button. It was the rear passenger-side window from which I was feeling the freezing, speeding air.

I'm just grateful my apple fastball didn't break the window. Can you imagine that conversation with the clerk at the auto glass shop?